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Francis Hates Left 4 Dead

By Shamus
on Saturday Mar 21, 2009
Filed under:


Link (YouTube)

Francis is one of the 4 selectable characters in the game. He’s a 6’5 (very tall, for you metric thinkers) biker with tattoos and a vest. His thing is that he goes around saying how much he hates the various environs you’re obliged to explore in the game. Francis hates everything. While in the single-player game, I got in the habit of always playing as Francis because he blended in with the horde, color-wise. Bill, Louis, and Zoe are much brighter and more colorful, and so I’m less likely to shoot them.

Although this strategy works against me online. Now I’m playing as mister-oh-look-a-zombie-oops-no-it’s-Francis-again.

I love Francis. And vests.

Comments (27)

  1. mark says:

    as I said in the other L4D comment thread (near the bottom, so most people probably didnt see it), L4D is at its best played offline co-op either on a LAN or with the Xbox360’s system link. No lag, and your teammates are right there next to you to yell at when you get pinned, vomited on, shot by your own team, etc.

    “Stop FUCKING Shooting Me!” – Me, playing as francis, last night, MANY TIMES.

  2. JFargo says:

    That game looks like a lot of fun. I might have to pick it up.

  3. Randy Johnson says:

    Bill is one of the 4 selectable characters in the game. He's a 6″² (decently tall, for you metric thinkers) Vietnam veteran with a green beret and a jacket. His thing is that he goes around saying how much harder the last zombie outbreak was. Bill deals with his fear with sarcasm. While in the single-player game, I got in the habit of always playing as Bill because I felt the need to save him. Francis, Louis, and Zoe are all young punks so I am more likely to shoot them.

    Although this strategy works against me online. Now I'm constantly shooting Oh-Mister-I-hate-life-and-beingshot-by-my-teammates-Francis.

    I love Bill. And Berets.

    ((I had a weird Satire itch I needed to scratch after reading your post, Shamus))

  4. Carra says:

    I played it a bit online but playing with different strangers each time isn’t much fun.

  5. Derek K. says:

    I always play Francis if I can. I love him.

    “Hey Bill. If your beard turns, can I shoot it?”

    Here’s the big L4D secret: EVERYONE hates Bill. Even Bill.

    Also, check out the original Francis concept art:


  6. Lebkin says:

    I am always Bill. The guy keeps up with the young punks just fine, and he’s got the advantage of age. Win-win.

    Oddly enough, of the four people I normally play with, there are three guys and one girl, perfect for the L4D team. Makes it less confusing and more immersive.

  7. RedClyde says:

    My favorite comment from the game is in the No Mercy elevator when Zoey says: “I just can’t get over how fast they all are. I’m calling zombie bullshit on this one. *laughs nervously* I mean… they’re not… allowed to be so fast.”

    You had to be there. >.>

  8. Thunnokephalos says:

    I love the dynamic between Bill and Francis, the banter they have. My favorite is in Blood Harvest (I think that’s the one): we went inside a trailer to look for supplies, and Bill said, “This remind you of home, Francis?”


  9. BlackBloc says:

    My gf tells me that the best elevator banter she got was Francis asking who farted, and Zoey replies ‘oops’ or something like that. I’ve never witnessed it.

    (The funny part was that apparently this was fiction imitating real life, if you get my drift.)

  10. Julian says:

    I want to play L4D very much, but $50 is a lot of money for something I have never tried. Too bad there is no demo, and even pirating it would be a pain in the ass, being a Steam game (plus, there probably would be like 2 servers)

    I’ll just wait for someone to Give The Gift of Game (wink wink)

  11. Russ says:

    Oddly enough, I always have the most problems with accidentally shooting Bill. The green army jacket makes me think he’s one of the army zombies when he moves into my field of view from the corner of my eye and all I see is his back.

    One of the funnietst comments I’ve seen in game is in Dead Air, as you go through the airport there is some graffiti on one of the walls that says “God is Dead” – and Zoe said “Oh my God! The Zombies killed God!”. I’ve only heard her say it once though.

  12. Danath says:

    I had a hilarious moment with Bill, in one game, we were on the second tank, everyone was dead except me, I managed to kill the tank while on the tip of the plane in Dead Air, and I jumped off to run to the plane… I took fall damage and died.

    Thats right, Bill’s brittle old man legs broke and he died from a short fall, my team wouldnt let me hear the end of that one.

    Also, the banter between Bill and Francis, <3

  13. Eric Meyer says:

    Can’t really fault his out-of-game hates and not-hates. Well, except maybe for the last couple.

  14. Lee says:

    I still prefer my initial misconception where I heard Francis say “I don’t hate Venice.” I thought it added more to the character.

  15. Rutskarn says:

    The original Francis concept art resembles less “grizzled, but virtuous iron-man biker” and more “creepy deep-woods sexual offender”.

    Anyway, my favorite Francis line:

    “Hey, Bill, let me borrow your medkit for second. …I just wanna LOOK at it!”

  16. Scott says:

    Francis: “I’m not gonna let these vampires-”
    Bill: “They’re ZOMBIES, Francis!”

    And at the end of “Blood Harvest”
    Francis: “I love the God damn ARMY!”

  17. Matt says:

    I enjoy playing with people in the same room, but playing over the internet is close to as good – with open mic turned on. That way I don’t have to lean on the voice key in order for my friends to hear me shriek like a little girl when a hunter leaps on me.

    You do have to be a little bit careful about talking to your SO with open mic turned on, though.

  18. Allen says:

    Why Ayn Rand? I mean, I’m not arguing, I’m just…. c’mon, context?

  19. BlackBloc says:

    Context: in the airport levels, there’s a statue of Atlas with a globe on his back. That’s where Francis will occasionally say that line.

  20. Allen: The campaign Dead Air revolves around the Ayn Rand International Airport. There is really no other context.


  21. JKjoker says:

    i thought giving the player characters a personality rather than letting them make a generic one like most games do was a great idea, but i still think the game needs a LOT more content to justify the price, also it would have been nice if the single player was a little more than an after thought

  22. Derek K. says:

    I once played a game with someone whose Steam name was Zoey.

    She played Bill.

    It was very odd.

    But the weirdest was when she was Infected….

    Strangely, I can’t remember a single thing Louis says except for “Do I *look* like one of them?” when you shoot him. Guess he doesn’t have great lines.

  23. Thunnokephalos says:

    Louis has THE best line:

    “Grabbin’ Peels.”

    Oh, and I think he must be a motivational speaker, because he’s always saying, “Stay positive, guys!”

  24. Danath says:

    Lous is very generic “captain positive”, the reason hes “forgettable” is unlike zoey, bill, and francis is he doesnt have great interaction with them, like the back and forth banter those three get.

    He does have some legitimately great lines though, he falls into the more cliche survivor, “Were gonna make it guys!” “stay positive!” that kind of thing… you know, the guy that usually dies first in zombie movies, I think this was intentional. Also hes black, another old movie shoutout “the black guy always dies first!”.

  25. Rutskarn says:

    @Shamus’s Twitter Feed:

    Yeah, Team Fortress 2 is tricky at first, but I think you’ll be surprised how quickly one can get used to it. I managed to get a couple classes down to the point where I can hold my own and then some within the first week.

    I still suck at some of them, though. Like spy, as you no-doubt observed tonight…

    Anyways, nice playing with you, again.

  26. Ertwin says:

    The correct response to Louis’ “do I *Look* like one of them?” amongst my friends is “YES!”

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